Friday 22 November 2013

This week on It Takes Two, we have learnt...

- The Tower Ballroom has a “sorry corridor”, so named because it’s very narrow and so everyone walking down it is constantly saying “sorry!” to everyone they meet.
- Fiona was a bit disappointed not to get a chance to do the salsa. (Anton, less so.)
- Abbey calls Fiona “mummy”. Creepy.
- Craig was horrified when he saw the other judges getting their tens out for Abbey’s quickstep. You and us both, sir.
- Craig enjoys being whipped.
- Craig isn’t sure whether Susanna is “ever going to be a 10-girl” for him. (He'll miraculously get over this if she makes the final, because at that point he usually gives 10s out for any old shit. Scientists have named this "the Snowdon-Hollins Principle".)
- Sophie concentrates on footwork before frame but promises to change that if she ever gets to dance ballroom again.
- Brendan choreographed Sophie’s quickstep assuming they’d have slightly more space to run around than they actually did.
- Brendan would like to know if you can tie your snake in a knot. Monday's episode clearly brought out all the fetishes.
- There were only a couple of moves from Hairspray in Mark’s jive, and the rest was all Iveta.
- You should not leave your fruit unsupervised around Iveta, because she will eat it all.
- The reason behind Mark’s dodgy knees is that he tore the cartilage in both of them in week two of training, but kept it quiet because he didn’t want the sympathy vote.
- One of Mark and Iveta’s plans to grab votes this weekend is for her to go topless and him to go bottomless.
- The cha cha cha came from Cuba via the Mambo and a French teacher called Monseur Pierre brought the steps over.
- Some people think its name comes from the sound of shuffling feet, others from the sound of a guiro.
- The cha cha has been performed more than any other times in Strictly – 111 times.
- The cha cha was the first dance Pasha learned. Also, Pasha's impression of himself as a baby dancer is the cutest thing you will ever see.
- You can dance a cha cha cha to any song with four beats to a bar. Which is pretty much all modern pop songs, according to Janette.
- Despite Craig’s requests, Patrick and Anya are kind of non-committal about reprising their samba if they make it to the final.
- The button Karen Hardy never pushes in her car is the sport one. (?)
- Karen Hardy agrees with Craig, and us, on Abbey and Aljaž – SO MUCH GAPPING.
- Karen also notes the lack of gapping in Sophie and Brendan’s dance and thinks the only thing that wasn’t perfect was her hand. We love Karen quite a lot this week.
- You need aesthetically lovely legs for the rumba. Well, that’s me out then.
- Susanna gave Abbey “a little mum-chat” before her quickstep on Saturday, and Abbey thinks it worked.
- Abbey can’t remember what dance she is doing this week. (If you're reading this Abbey, it's a paso doble.)
- Mini-Aljaž on his first trip to BLACKPOOL looked a bit like Andy from Emmerdale.
- Abbey would like to go back to the assault course.
- James is considered the loudest of the professional dancers by his colleagues, while Kristina is the most high-maintenance.
- Susanna still doesn’t think she’s a 10.
- Despite us learning on Tuesday that cha cha cha is the easiest dance, Susanna thinks it is really hard.
- Susanna thinks about Pasha a lot. Well, she’s only human.
- Kevin in a Pasha mask with his glasses over the top gives us many complicated feelings.
- It only took about half an hour to get Natalie’s hair under that wig on Saturday. So now we know.
- Artem didn’t think Natalie’s charleston wasn’t worth a 10 on Saturday. Neither did Natalie.
- In an ideal world, costume designer Vicky would be able to level all of the dresses with a hedge trimmer to save time.
- The vibe for Sophie’s dresses all series has been ‘Audrey Hepburn’.
- Ashley owns a few Robin-worthy vests.
- Kristina still wasn’t happy with their score at the weekend because she thinks Ben was undermarked on Saturday. Yes, UNDERmarked.
- The theme for Ben and Kristina’s charleston is him working out at the gym. It’ll be a miracle if he’s wearing any clothes at all, won’t it?
- Ben would like to do a rugby player dance-off with Austin Healey and Matt Dawson at some point. No doubt Austin will be ROBBED, as per fucking usual.
- It is sometimes not the choice of the pros or the celebrities to attach a theme to a given dance. *face of surprise*
- Aljaž really misses Janette and Julien.
- Rachel’s exit was all about Abbey, and don’t you forget it.
- Natalie is very upset that she wasn’t around to say goodbye to Dave.
- Vernon Kay thinks Abbey has a chance of winning. OK, Kay.
- Jenny Eclair wants to see someone good lose it partway through. She also wants more wardrobe malfunctions and someone to lose a bra (doesn’t Ben do that every week?)
- Gabrielle of 'Dreams' fame has a bit of a thing for Patrick Robinson.
- Jenny Éclair wants Ashley to win, Gabrielle Sophie and Vernon Kay ‘one of the girls’ – YEAR OF THE WOMAN.

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